Pupdate from the Crate: I MUST SHRED!!

Happy Monday!  Today is the best day ever!  It is cool and quiet here at home and that gets me so excited that I can't seem to sit still!  Mom is giving you two pictures today.  The first one is so that you will see me calm and sweet and that helps mom with the rest of my day when I am....well...hell on wheels and full of something she calls piss and vinegar even though I pee as much as I can to not be full of anything, but I guess I am.

So, in case you missed it, over the weekend I got to do a photo shoot!  Yep!  My own modeling session and I was GRRRRREAT!  I think they even have a picture of me being SUPER ARDIE! flying through the air, but I have wait for something called "a development" then I will know.  But do you see my kiss marks?  Well how it happened was I was going down the drive to the car and dad asked mom if she kissed me and mom said no, why, and dad said well....the dog has lipstick marks on his eyebrow so maybe he's been monkeying around on your make up....and I wasn't, so mom scrubbed and scrubbed it off.  Then, when we got to the photographer, she told him about it and he LOVED it so much he asked her to smooch me all over again at the end and then this is what happened.  Dad says I look wounded..

.And there I am on my cool mat.  It is wonderful  and cools me right down but today I was already cool so I decided to play with my mat and then I remembered that today was SHREDDING MONDAY, Monday, MONDAY!  So I quickly went nuts on it and chomped a big hole right in the middle before mom took it away and now I can't have it.  It was supposed to be bite proof, so I must have SUPER Ardie teeth!  Ta da!  

And then I just went nuts on everything I could get my teeth on even though mom tried to play tug with me, tried to chase me, tried to play ball with me and gave me a yummy Kong filled with steak bits.  The carpets kept calling me....saying...Arrr...deee....ArrrDEE!  Come here boy, we have loose threads....help us please!  

So the next picture is how I tried to help the front door carpet, and then I tried to help the kitchen carpet and I tried to help the patio door rug, so on the way Dad's shoe called me and I took it with me and then I got distracted and went to my treat puzzle.  Wow!  Just that fast!  I love my treat puzzle and I can work it like a champ!  But now, after I find all the treats, I taught myself how to throw this big wooden toy in the air to see if anything else might bust lose and all it does is make mom grumpy so now, today, I just decided to chew it apart....just like that...and she still got grumpy and took it away.

So, now it's my nap time, and I'm so exhausted.  I wouldn't be near as tired if mom didn't always follow me  and make me do something else.  If I could just take care of one carpet in a single sitting, well, that could keep me busy for a long long time and mom would not have to chase me!  I also told her that maybe instead of toys, she should just buy more rugs!  Seems like a great SUPER ARDIE idea to me!

I'm getting ready to go spend the weekend with Aunt Margie cause mom and dad are going to some big party in Cincinnati where they have to wear all white...yeah...just like me!  Mom wants to find a white wig, and a white mask....what kind of party is this?  Oh well, I'll have more fun at my Auntie's house and maybe can learn to swim too while I'm there and maybe sleep on her bed again but I will have to think of a way to trick her into thinking I'm sad or scared, or maybe I'll just jump on her bed and then go all rubbery and she will be like "oooh, this little doggy is wayyyy to heavy for me to pick up...he is wayyyyy to soft and cuddly to sleep in a hard crate....he is going to be soooooo sad sleeping alone" and then BOOM! I'm in bed!  

So, have a beautiful day and I hope you get to shred anything you want today, and that no one chases you off of it!    Xox Ardie, I"m too sexy for my tail" super model shredding machine