Breaking News Pupdate from the Crate

Hey everyone!  Something's gone down over here today that you all need to be aware of in case Mom and I disappear for a while.  She says we might even have to change our names or get a make over.  Well, maybe just me because where she says she is going, none of that can help her.  But here is my story and I'm sticking with it!

Ya know the cool new bed my Mom and Dad got me?  Well, I was having the best day ever by flipping it over and jumping on it and then one thing led to another and before you know it ....I committed a felony.   I thought Mom was gonna pass out.  She saw me ripping the tags off the bed and freaked out!  

First, she reached inside my throat and poked around my mouth and I must say that is my personal space, but she seems to go in there any time she wants she says for my own good, and there was nothing in there so she relaxed and then told me a very scary story.  She showed me the writing on the tag that says do not remove under penalty of law!  YOwZers!!  I'm a puppy!  I can't even read yet!  How was I supposed to know?  And Mom said "my little man, ignorance is no excuse....now, you sit in your crate and try to memorize phone numbers in case the Feds show up here and take you to prison.  I have to go get my drivers license changed!"

Well, after that I was scared straight, as they say and I am trying to learn my people-sister's phone number because Mom said maybe she is the only one who can save me if they take me away cause she is an "officer of the law" and might have some pull up at the Big House.

In Mom's case, I don't think my people-sister can help her because Mom thinks she is "going to hell in a hand basket" because she told a lie today and that is where people go when they tell lies.  Mom said it was a white lie, and I think she did it just to help us create a new identity if we need to go on the run after the tag incident.  Mom told me she didn't answer her driver's license questions honestly but her side is that she actually didn't lie.  She told me the MAN asked her if everything was still the same as on her old license and she said .....yes....but it wasn't....one thing was off by a few pounds....or maybe  more than a few pounds.  She even asked him if he could use her old photo and when he said no, she tried to bribe him (I mean she asked him quietly) I'd he could photo shop her today picture to erase a few wrinkles and lift up her chin line.  She told me he didn't laugh and said NO and told her to sit and wait.  Personally, I think he is on to us, and didn't want to get involved.

Mom says people can go to h-e-l-l for telling lies so I'm never going to tell a lie.  Well, Mom took a picture of the evidence and is sending it out to all of you in case I need an attorney.  

Xox Ardie